


Keeping You Warm

by Nera_Solani



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftermath of a Case, Case Fic, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dryads - Freeform, Falling Castiel, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Huddling For Warmth, Human Castiel, I couldn't decide on one so I used all three, Implied Switching, Injured Dean Winchester, M/M, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Non-Penetrative Sex, amphitere, chupacabra, lost in a forest, not all creatures are monsters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-31 09:49:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15116870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nera_Solani/pseuds/Nera_Solani
Summary: After a supposedly easy hunt takes an unexpected turn, team free will is split up in the middle of an extensive forest. Dean is missing, Cas is looking for him, running like a man possessed and Sam is just trying to catch up. But there is still a monster lurking among the trees, Castiel is slowly losing his powers, Dean is bleeding and there are other secrets waiting in the shadows to behold. The race is on.





	1. The Forest: Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my contribution to the first ever Trenchstiel Mini Bang, sadly I didn't receive any art from my artists, so I decided to take matters into my own hands and made a piece of art myself.  
> Many thanks to my amazing beta Zwetschge14 who kicked my ass and got my words under control, haha.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this!

Castiel was running through a forest. It was still day, that much he could tell by the sunlight glistening through the crowns of the trees once in a while. Dry leaves were crunching under his feet, cold wind biting his face as he kept on running. His coat was bloodstained, not with his own blood though… Sam was somewhere behind him. At least he should be. Hopefully. How had it even come to this? This should’ve never happened, it should’ve been over hours ago… This was supposed to be an easy case! But now he was running like a madman through a forest, chasing a monster he probably couldn’t even fight in his state. But that didn’t matter. All that mattered, was finding Dean and bringing him home, safely and alive.

His coat got caught on a tree branch and he fell, but got up again immediately. The coat was ripped, but he’d fix it later. He wasn’t wearing his suit anymore aside from when they pretended to be FBI agents, those times were long over. He’d switched to more practical and hunter-like clothing, jeans and a plaid shirt, but the overcoat had stayed. There were a lot of memories tied to that tan piece of clothing and Dean seemed to be very fond of it too. Cas wrapped his coat tightly around himself to shield his body from the cold autumn wind. He was still an angel, but it was a long time ago since he’d last been so human. He didn’t have any objections to that, really, it was just that he wished he’d be more powerful right now for the sake of saving Dean. It wasn’t even a surprise, he’d known for months now that his powers were slowly leaving him and he’d made his peace with it. Sometimes he actually looked forward to it. He was looking forward to tasting food the way it was supposed to taste and also to sleeping and a million other little things, but he’d also miss being able to heal Sam and Dean, as well as the look Dean gave him whenever he’d smite something.

They’d rolled into town a few days ago, checking out strange occurrences on a construction area. It hadn’t taken them long to figure out that the construction works had upset some kind of nature spirit and soon they’d found themselves in the middle of negotiations with a group of dryads who’d wanted to keep the workers from cutting down their oak trees. Dryads are usually peaceful nature spirits, but they live inside oak trees and who wouldn’t be mad if someone came to log down their house? The negotiations had mainly worked over Castiel, since he was able to understand the dryads and knew what they wanted. It had taken hours, but they’d managed to convince the dryads to move into the nearby Lost Maples State Natural Area, where they’d find a forest full of oak trees that wouldn’t be cut down. After having been escorted safely to their new home, the dryads had even thanked the three hunters. And from there, everything had gone terribly wrong.

Another cold gust of wind blew through the trees and Castiel shivered. It was insane to run after a monster like that when his grace was so weak. He didn’t even have his angel blade with him, he’d lost it during the attack and now Sam had it. His grace had been getting progressively weaker ever since he’d turned away from heaven completely. It wasn’t for the reason that an angel needed contact to heaven to keep his powers, seraphim were an exception to that rule, instead he guessed that it had something to do with the fact that he’d finally allowed himself to let go of his past and his former responsibilities in heaven and moved on to do what he really wanted. He was living and hunting with the Winchesters and he was perfectly happy that way. More so than he ever was in heaven. He’d found the place where he wanted to be, where he _belonged_ and he never wanted to leave. At first it’d been hard for him to tell Sam and Dean that his grace was fading, but when he’d finally done it, they’d been so accepting and supportive that the soul that was surely somehow growing to take the place of his grace was aflame with happiness. He’d been trying to hold his grace for as long as possible, saving it for an emergency, but of course it had turned out differently. Communicating with the dryads and taking them all to the forest had weakened him significantly. Then, when they’d just been about to leave the forest and make their way home (Castiel had a _home_ now), a chupacabra had attacked out of nowhere all of a sudden. It had cost Cas almost every last bit of his powers to fend the creature off and heal Sam, but Dean had been taken. Right in front of Cas’ eyes, the monster had dragged the older Winchester away, deeper into the woods. Out of his mind, he’d gotten up to chase after the monster, which lead back to the current state of things: Cas, running through the forest as fast as his feet would carry him.

His breath came in harsh pants and the cold air stung in his lungs, but he didn’t stop. Not for a second. He felt dead tired and also hungry, his almost newfound humanity just starting to sink in, but sleep had to wait. He pulled his coat tighter around himself. Maybe he would have to get something warmer for the winter, now that he could actually feel temperature…

A sudden pang of longing forced him to stop and lean against a tree for support. So he could still feel prayers, at least from Dean. The older Winchester had a habit of sending unconscious prayers, but usually Cas would block them out or dull them, but now that he was so close to falling once and for all, it hit him full force. It was painful and he clutched his head, waiting for it to die down, but it also gave him hope. Dean was alive and apparently thinking about him. He still had a chance to find him, but he needed to do it fast. If he wouldn’t find him before sunset, the chances of finding him in one piece would lower significantly. Also, he didn’t know how long he could hold onto the last remnant of his grace. If it slipped away, he wouldn’t be able to receive Dean’s prayers anymore… He was still massaging his temple as he started walking again, a bit wobbly on his feet, but his steps grew more confident soon. He was panting heavily and his heart was pounding like a drumstick against his ribcage, but he picked up the pace and continued running anyway.

It was in a small alley ( _really_ small) that he finally collapsed, panting for breaths and vision blurring from total exhaustion. His legs had given out underneath him and he barely managed to drag himself to the nearest tree to lean against it, staring up into the brown, yellow and red leaves above him. His head was swimming and for a moment he wasn’t sure if he might pass out when suddenly he was hit by another ache of longing from Dean. Then Dean was praying. It was mostly incoherent babbling with Cas’ name interspersed, at least as much as he could tell since he didn’t understand all of it, and then something about a cave. All of a sudden the prayer changed into pictures, a memory. His filter for unintentional prayers must really be broken if he was receiving even memories from Dean now… It might also have something to do with their profound bond… Cas pulled his coat tightly around himself as he let the memory wash over him, enveloping him in warmth no coat in the world could possibly provide.

It appeared to be the moment when he’d stepped out in front of Dean and Sam after finally having gotten cleaned up from purgatory again. It was strange to see this scene from Dean’s point of view, sitting in his place on the chair, looking through his eyes. Then Cas saw himself stepping into the room, suit and old trench coat in place. It was a nostalgic sight, but also very confusing as he realized that memory-Dean was giving memory-him a very slow once-over, swallowed thickly and then proceeded to do a less than decent job at trying to avert his eyes as he shifted in his chair. Cas was hit by a storm surge of emotions, unable to identify any of them as they were all just kind of blending into each other, making his heart speed up and his hands shake. Then the memory ended and he was back in the chilly forest, sitting on the cold ground. His heartbeat was luckily slowing down now and his breathing was evening out, but his hands were still shaking from the weird memory/prayer and he took another short moment to recover from that. He dug his fingers into his thin coat, the only shield he had against the cold autumn wind.

A cave. Dean had mentioned a cave in his prayer. The chupacabra must’ve dragged him into its lair. Now Cas finally took in his surroundings. The alley he was in, was in fact, not an alley. It was an area of destruction. Trees were broken in half, some were even ripped out of the ground, big claw marks scratched into the bark. Blood was splattered across the ground and some more was leading away from the area in a trail. Cas didn’t know what had happened here, but it certainly couldn’t be anything good. His best bet now was to follow the trail of blood and hope to his father that Dean was still alive.

As Castiel was making his way through the forest along the deep red trail of blood, he felt another wave of longing from his righteous man that caused a flood of relief to wash through his entire body. He took a moment, leaned against a tree and closed his eyes, savoring the feeling, even the slight ache in his head and his chest that it brought with it, because it meant Dean was alive.

 

Cas did his best to keep himself awake, mainly with thoughts of Dean. The hunter really seemed to like Castiel’s coat for some reason. He’d compliment him on it on occasion and once he’d even put it on himself when they’d gone to a convention for a case. Cas thought about how Dean’s hand would sometimes linger on his shoulder or back, letting warmth seep through the thin fabric. He wanted to feel that again. It was never enough.

He pulled his coat tighter around himself, thinking about Dean wearing it. For a moment he got lost in his thoughts and memories and he tripped over a root that was standing out of the forest soil. He fell and barely managed to keep from face planting into the hard ground. Groaning, he pushed himself off the ground with his hands and got up again. As he looked in front of himself, he noticed a big hole in the hill a couple feet away. It wasn’t just an ordinary hole in the ground, it looked more like a den. A really big den. At least big enough for a chupacabra. Cas moved slowly towards the entrance in an effort to make as little sound as possible. The moment of surprise was everything he had after all and chupacabras have a rather good sense of hearing.

Another feeling of longing blurred his vision. “Not now, Dean…”, he mumbled. Suddenly he heard a cracking sound. He’d stepped onto a dry tree branch.

The last thing he saw before he found himself enveloped in blackness was a set of sharp teeth and piercing yellow eyes, staring at him.

It appeared that he’d been sucked into another memory. This time it was the moment in Lucifer’s crypt right after Dean had broken through Naomi’s mind control. He saw it through Dean’s eyes again. This time the emotions were a lot clearer. Pain, sadness, but mostly concern about Castiel. The words he’d never forget ringing through the dusty crypt. “I need you.” Cas felt nothing but sincerity from Dean. The angel blade dropped to the ground and memory-Cas reached out to memory-Dean. What he felt now, was the greatest surprise about this whole situation. Dean thought Cas was going to finish it. He thought this would be his last moment. And what did he do? He reached out and held onto the trench coat as though it was his anchor. But memory-Cas healed him, because Castiel could never kill Dean.

The memory ended and Cas jerked awake, trying to orient himself. Looking around, he realized that he was inside the den now. It was dark. The chupacabra had apparently dragged him inside here. He quickly checked himself for injuries, but found only a few scratches, nothing major. As his eyes began to adjust to the dark, he started to evaluate his situation. The chupacabra was lying merely a few feet away from him on the ground. Dean was nowhere to be seen. In fact, Cas was the only person in this lair. He shifted in his place trying to get rid of what he was sitting on. It was apparently a bone. Now he noticed that there were a hundred different bones scattered all across the floor. Most of them were goat bones and some other animals that had found their end here. It wasn’t surprising since the word chupacabra was literally Spanish for goat-sucker, meaning the creature feeds off of goats by drinking their blood. They are also not opposed to feed off of other animals and even humans though. As it seemed, it hadn’t brought Dean into its lair and now Cas was trapped here. Whenever he would move too much, the chupacabra would growl or hiss at him, telling him to stay where he was. He didn’t have any weapons to defend himself, so he was stuck. He just hoped the creature wouldn’t get hungry any time soon.

Pulling his legs up against himself, he sighed. He’d failed. He didn’t find Dean and if he couldn’t find a way out of here, his brand new human life would end right away. That wasn’t exactly a rosy prospect. He put his hands over his face, trying to think. How could he have been so wrong? Looking over at the resting doglike creature with gray, reptile-skin again, he noticed that its breathing was labored. Something wasn’t right. Then he realized that there was a gaping wound on its side that was bleeding heavily. So the trail of blood he’d followed wasn’t Dean’s blood but the blood of the chupacabra… Just mere hours ago he would’ve been able to tell the difference without even looking closely, now he was totally useless. He put his head into his hands again, trying to calm his racing thoughts. He remembered what Dean had said to him when he’d told them about his diminishing grace.

“You’re not useless, buddy. You’re our family. We want you around with or without powers, you get that? Besides, you can learn how to hunt the human way. Only if you want of course… But I don’t want you to leave, okay?”

Without hesitation Cas had agreed to go hunting with Dean and Sam. He was staying with them ever since. He truly couldn’t imagine anything better. By now he’d become a pretty decent hunter and a respectable human. Having remarkable knowledge about every creature on this planet and beyond, was also helping. No, he wasn’t useless. But what could he do now? The monster was obviously weakened, but he couldn’t really fight it without a weapon… What could’ve possibly caused that wound anyway? It must’ve had something to do with the destructed area in the forest he’d come across earlier. There had obviously been a fight, but what kind of creature could be living in this forest and cause _that_? It was hard to tell without any further evidence. This park was in southern Texas, rather near to the Mexican border, so there could be creatures from North and also South American lore inhabiting this area. The best example was the chupacabra itself.

When the creature didn’t seem to pay attention, Cas quickly grabbed a spiky piece of bone and hid it inside his coat. Chupacabras had good hearing, but still mostly relied on their eyesight, so if he’d be able to take that from it, he might have a chance to flee… He was trying to sharpen the bone further on a small rock that was standing out of the dry soil next to him, when he felt a strong pull inside his chest. Then he was standing on the shore of a river, but it wasn’t really him, it was a memory again. He saw through Dean’s eyes as he walked into the river, releasing the Leviathan. Then the hunter walked up to the water and fished out his old, dirty coat, took a shaky breath and folded it. Castiel felt so much pain, sadness, regret, anger, bitterness and loss that it made his heart hurt. The memory was over as sudden as it had begun and he was sitting in the chupacabra’s lair again. Then he felt something he hadn’t dared to anticipate. Dean was praying. _Consciously_ praying.

_Hey man. I thought you might want to know that I’m alive. You’re probably still looking for me somewhere and I hope you can even still hear me… I’m in a pretty big cave right now. Some huge monster snatched me from the chupacabra and brought me here. I don’t know what it wants from me, but I’m in no condition to flee anyway. I have a pretty big wound in my leg, but I managed to stop the blood flow for now. It’s freezing here. Or maybe that’s the blood loss speaking… Whatever, I just wanted to let you know that I’m not dead. Yet. In case you don’t find me in time, I want you to know that I need you, Cas. I really do. And I always will. Don’t ever forget that…_

Then the prayer stopped and Cas felt a tear run down his cheek, which he quickly wiped away. His surroundings morphed again and he was in another memory, but this time memory-Dean was alone. There were empty bottles scattered across the dark room and Dean was cowering on the bed, hands in his hair, wearing Castiel’s old, muddy trench coat as he cried bitterly into the dirty fabric. The sobs that were continuously erupting from his throat were heart wrenching. He was mourning Cas, the falling angel realized. When he was back to reality, he was crying too, the tears flowing freely. He never knew that Dean had mourned him like this. That Castiel’s presumed death could’ve brought this strong man, this hunter, to his breaking point. He knew that, years later, Dean had mourned him too, but he’d never actually seen him do it. Now he had and it was heart breaking.

Cas wiped his wet cheeks with the sleeve of his coat. He wouldn’t be able to clean it up with just a thought anymore and he wouldn’t be able to fix it just like that either. Every rip and hole would leave a trace after it’d be stitched together by hand. A small scar in the fabric. Just as Cas himself would now start collecting scars on his skin. The dim light that was shimmering through the entrance of the den was slowly starting to get an orange tint. The sun was starting to set. He had to act soon.

Tightening his grip on the sharpened bone, he started moving. He slowly and carefully inched towards the creature and took his flashlight out of his pocket. When he switched it on, he held it directly into the creature’s face, blinding it for a moment that was enough to stab the bone into its left eye. The monster let out a loud screech that sounded almost like fingernails scratching over a chalkboard. Half blind it was disoriented and Cas attempted to flee from the cave, but the creature attacked and had him pinned to the floor in a flurry of movement. It was looming dangerously over him, fangs bared and breath smelling like iron, or more like decomposing blood. Cas turned his face away from it, waiting for the pain of a bite, but instead he heard Sam’s voice calling out for him. When the chupacabra noticed the intruder, it turned its head towards Sam who was just coming through the den’s entrance and instantly drew his gun, firing at the monster. The creature let out a high-pitched yelp, sounding almost like an injured dog. Cas used that opportunity to slip out under its body and stood up, making his way quickly towards Sam.

“Thank you,” he said.

“No problem, where’s Dean?”

“Not here, but he’s alive. He prayed to me minutes ago.”

“Okay, go find him then,” Sam told him.

“But the creature-”

Sam cut him off, drawing Cas’ angel blade, “It’s injured, I got this. Go find Dean and get him safe, I’ll find you somehow.”

Cas moved towards the exit, but looked back again at Sam and the growling monster. The creature fixed Cas with its icy stare and Sam yelled, “Go Cas! Now!”

And he did. As soon as he’d crawled out of the den, a cold breeze blew directly into his face and he shivered. He followed the trail of blood back to where it originated. The field of pure, raw destruction where the fight between two supernatural creatures had taken place. He ran as fast as he could, his whole body running on adrenaline alone.

Out of breath, he reached the demolished area again and started to look for clues to what might’ve taken Dean and where he was now. This time looking more closely, he noticed something he hadn’t seen before. There were a few small feathers stuck to the damaged trees and lying on the ground amongst the brown leaves. There was another, way smaller trail of blood leading into a different direction than the chupacabra’s. Dean had told him he had an injury on his leg, so this must be his blood. Cas hadn’t seen that trail the first time around, because it wasn’t so well visible and he hadn’t bothered looking closer since he’d already found the other trail. He started to follow the smaller trail, keeping his eyes open for other signs that he might be on the right way this time. There were some more greenish brown feathers, mostly down, stuck to the bark of trees as well as to some bushes.

He kept running as long and as fast as he could, but the cold air was stinging in his lungs, forcing him to slow down and breathe properly. Thunder rumbled in the distance and Cas knew that he had to hurry, because otherwise the trail of blood would be washed away by the oncoming rain. His body was shaking from the cold and he was pretty sure he couldn’t feel his toes anymore, but he carried on nonetheless.

It got dark too soon and so it took him even longer to follow the trail of blood and feathers. Sometimes when the trees were standing a bit further apart he could catch a glimpse of the sky. It was cloudy and he couldn’t see many stars, but it made him think of stargazing with the Winchester brothers anyway. He heard the hoot of an owl in the distance as he kept walking. A drop of water hit his face and he looked up again. The clouds had become darker, thicker, a crash of thunder sounded nearby. The storm was getting closer. As he looked back onto his path, he sighted a cave entrance behind a group of close standing trees only a few yards away. He started running again as the rain intensified and by the time he was inside the cave it was pouring outside. Luckily he hadn’t gotten too wet, but he still needed a lot of strength to keep his teeth from chattering as he began to walk deeper into the rocky cave, where the air started to get slightly warmer.

It was quiet and he could hear the soft drumming of the rain as it hit the ground, occasionally interrupted by the sound of thunder. He dug his flashlight out of his pocket and switched it on. He supposed that normally the light of day would be enough to light it at least dimly, but now it was night and a storm was raging outside, darkening the sky to the point of blackness. He kept the light mostly pointed down onto the ground in order to avoid tripping, but when he heard a sound, he instantly flashed the light into the direction it had come from.

And there he was. Dean. Sitting on the cold, stony floor, leaning against the wall, one hand pressed over a blood-soaked piece of cloth on his left thigh.

“Dean…”, Cas breathed out in utter relief.

“Cas… no, be careful,” the hunter pleaded. He sounded tired, the blood loss already affecting him.

Still it sounded like Dean was trying to warn him. Probably about the monster that had brought him here.

Cas slowly and carefully started to point his flashlight around the cave, but he didn’t even need to search. There, merely a few feet next to Dean was a huge creature that almost filled out the whole room of the big cave. It was a snake, surely about 60 feet long, its head alone 3 feet and its whole body completely covered in greenish brown feathers, two huge bird wings growing on its back. Cas’ heart stopped for a moment, then he breathed out in relief.

He walked up to Dean, careful to not startle the creature and kneeled down next to him.

“Cas, what are you doing? The monster-”, Dean started, but Cas just shook his head softly.

“It won’t hurt me, just as it didn’t hurt you. This is an amphitere, Dean. They’re peaceful creatures. It must’ve seen you being dragged across the ground by the chupacabra and decided to help you. It brought you here into its lair to protect you. It never held you hostage, it was watching over you.”

“Amphitere? I think I’ve heard of that. Old Aztec and Mayan myth, but I thought they weren’t real… or had at least died out,” Dean mumbled, glancing at the feathered snake who was watching them with interest.

“Probably because you never had to hunt one. They are not evil, they’re one of the kindest species I know,” Cas explained.

The creature lowered its head to look at them both more closely with its big green eyes and made a soft cooing noise.

“What does it want?”, Dean asked wryly.

“It seems to be concerned about your state. Also, I think it’s a female.”

It was moments like these that Dean was reminded of the fact that Cas had lived millennia before they had met and that he had knowledge Dean couldn’t even imagine.

“Well, then tell it I’ll be fine. It’s making me uncomfortable…”

The amphitere gave him a wry look and withdrew immediately.

“They’re very smart, Dean, she can understand what you say. And I think she highly doubts that you’re okay.”

Dean rolled his eyes and tried to change the topic, “Where’s Sam?”

“I don't know, he was somewhere behind me and took care of the chupacabra, but now he probably had to look for shelter against the storm.”

“I hope he found one, cuz that is one hell of a storm…”

“I’m sure he did, he has GPS on his phone after all, there must be a small cabin here somewhere.”

“How is he gonna find us anyway? All traces you followed will probably be gone after the storm is over.”

Cas furrowed his brow, “I don’t know. My phone broke when the chupacabra attacked, so I can’t contact him…”

“Great. Now we’re both stuck here…”, Dean grumbled, “Not that I’m not glad to see you, man, but… you know what I mean.”

Cas gave him a lopsided smile, “Don’t worry, Sam will find us somehow, but until then, we should take care of your wound.”

“What wound? I’m fine.”

“I heard your prayer, Dean,” Cas reminded him with a raised eyebrow.

Dean swallowed, “Oh, that. Nah, could be worse.”

“Let me see it,” Cas demanded.

Dean complied and withdrew his hand from where it was pressing onto the still bleeding wound and Cas carefully took the soaked cloth away to asses the situation.

“Dean, this is _bad_. If we don’t do something soon you might die of blood loss!”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Fine, then do something. Heal me or whatever.”

Cas averted his eyes, “I can’t. I already had to heal Sam after the chupacabra took you. I’m almost powerless. Hearing your prayers is the only thing that I have left. My grace, it’s… nearly gone.”

“Oh, ‘m sorry, man…”

Cas gave him a soft smile full of fondness, “It’s okay, you know I’m fine with it and I wouldn’t exchange a life with you and Sam for anything else. The only problem is that I can’t heal you like this… But maybe there’s another way.”

Dean just gave him a questioning look.

“I know an old enochian healing spell that could do it,” he explained and started to think about what he’d need to make it work.

“I would need some moss, a fern leaf, the bark of an old oak tree and the feather of an amphitere.”

“Well, we have an amphitere right here and I’m sure there’s loads of moss and ferns in the forest,” Dean thought aloud.

“Yes, the only real problem is the old oak tree… and that it’s pouring outside.”

Cas turned towards the amphitere, who was curled up across from them, using her own body as pillow as she was watching their interaction.

He stood up and walked towards her, carefully reaching out to where one of her beautiful feathers was lying on the ground, arranged like a nest, and asked, “May I?”

She replied with a soft coo and withdrew her tail from where it was lying in the way. Cas picked up the feather and bowed his head slightly, “Thank you.”

He brought the feather to Dean and the hunter just said, “Huh, that was easy.”

“The hard part is going outside into the storm and then not die of hypothermia…”, Cas commented as he started to walk into the direction of the cave entrance.

“Cas wait, you can’t go out there, like you said, you could die!”

“I know, but if I don’t, you will die for sure, so I’m taking the chance. I saw a really old oak tree on the way here. It won’t take long.”

Dean swallowed hard and Cas was overcome by another sense of longing, “Don’t do that, Cas. Stay. Please.”

“Dean I…”

Just as he was about to go anyway, the amphitere raised her head from where it was lying and caught their attention with a questioning coo.

Cas looked up at her, tilting his head and contemplated for a moment before he asked, “Would you help me?”

Now the amphitere tilted her head as well and then started to move towards the cave’s entrance, Cas watching her with a mixture of surprise and gratefulness as he followed. He quickly collected the moss and the fern, while the amphitere disappeared into the forest, only to come back mere minutes later with a piece of bark between her jaws, offering it to Castiel as they both were back in the shelter of the cave. Cas smiled at her as he said his thanks and she even allowed him to touch her head for a short moment.

They returned to Dean, both of them wet, but not nearly as wet as Castiel would’ve been if he would’ve had to go alone. The amphitere shook out her enormous wings and tail before settling back into her nest. Then she blew a warm puff of breath directly at Cas, serving as a very big hairdryer for his whole body and clothes, which caused Dean to chuckle and Cas couldn’t help but join him.

“What’s next, are you gonna breath fire?”, Dean joked, looking at the amphitere.

She just blinked at him in confusion.

“Dean, she’s not a dragon. Amphitere don’t breath fire,” Cas replied with a chuckle.

He crouched down next to Dean and started to crumble the bark into small, brown, wet pieces, then he added the moss and squished it all with a stone until it was a fine paste, which he then put onto the fern leaf. Lastly he took the feather, looked for a rather fresh wound on his body and dipped it inside, so that there was blood on it, then he put it on top of the mixture.

“What the hell? You didn’t say anything about blood,” Dean pointed out a bit shocked.

“I’m still an angel, however little of my grace might be left, and an angel’s blood makes almost every spell stronger.”

Dean stared at him and the bloody feather for a moment, but didn’t say anything else about it.

“Put off your pants, I need to reach the whole wound.”

Dean’s eyes widened, “Hell no, it’s freezing! Are you insane?!”

Cas sighed, “You’re probably right, that wouldn’t be such a good idea. You can leave your pants on, but I’ll have to rip the cut more open to access the whole wound underneath.”

“Yeah okay, do that.”

And Cas did. It’s not easy to rip jeans, but he managed to do it just enough to access the wound as a whole. Then Cas carefully placed the fern leaf with all the ingredients atop the deep wound, making Dean wince, and started saying something in enochian Dean couldn’t understand. The pain started to lessen and when Cas was finished with the spell, the pain had dissipated completely and Dean breathed out in relief. Cas removed the ingredients from Dean’s leg and it was fully healed, not a trace of the slash wound left.

Cas sat down next to Dean and said, “Now we only have to wait for Sam to find us…”

“Yeah…” Dean shivered.

“You’re cold,” Cas observed, his hands shaking as well.

“Yeah, well, so are you.”

Cas nodded. Dean looked away for a moment and inched a little closer, “So… this time the whole humanity stuff is gonna be permanent, right?”

“Yes,” Cas answered with a barely there smile.

“And you’re really fine with it? I mean, that’s big…”

Cas chuckled, “You know, in some way I’ve already been human for quite some time. Falling completely is just the next logical step, isn’t it?”

Now Dean smiled too, “There surely isn’t any other angel as human as you, buddy.”

“Thank you, I’m taking that as a compliment,” Cas told him with a hint of pride.

“You should, because it definitely was one,” Dean replied with so much sincerity in his voice that it made Cas’ stomach flip.

Across from them the amphitere seemed to enjoy the show, her head pillowed on her long body again.

Cas pulled his coat tighter around himself. It was completely dry now, thanks to the big, feathery hairdryer that was watching them with fascination. Dean shivered beside him, his jacket ripped into shreds by the teeth and claws of the chupacabra.

“You, know…”, Cas started hesitantly, not sure if he should say this or not, but then he remembered Dean’s prayers and memories and they gave him hope. Hope that there could be _more_.

“Yeah?”, Dean required after a moment of silence.

Cas took another second to collect his words and said, “I couldn’t only hear your prayer.”

Dean raised an eyebrow at him, “Huh? What do you mean?”

The falling angel took a deep breath and explained, “My filter for unconscious prayers seems to be broken, so I also received some memories from you that were related to me. And of course I also felt your longing…”

There was a moment of silence as Dean processed that piece of information.

“Okay, um… Yeah, I thought about you a couple times since I’m here… I didn’t know you’d feel that.”

“I was just as surprised when it happened for the first time, believe me.”

Dean chuckled weakly, “Sorry…”

Cas just smiled, “Nothing to be sorry for. It was the only thing that kept me going, since it told me you were still alive.”

Now the amphitere suddenly made a cooing sound that was the closest to an “aaaaawww” as it could possibly get.

Dean and Cas both turned to give her a funny look and she just stared back at them with an expression of pure innocence. Well, as far as that was possible for such a big creature.

Dean sighed and looked at the ground as he asked again, “Back to the issue of how Sam is supposed to find us here. I mean, for all we know we’re in the middle of nowhere and by the time this storm is over, all traces he could follow will be gone.”

“I don’t know, but he surely will find us eventually,” Cas replied quietly.

“Yeah, you already said that, but how long is that gonna take? Days? Shouldn’t we just go out there and look for a phone or something so we can call him?”

“Dean, we’re miles away from any building, never mind a phone… We don’t know where we are and would most likely just get lost. Also we have no idea how many other supernatural creatures there might be in this forest and we are both unarmed. Our best chance is to stay here and wait for Sam to find us, which he can do easier when we are not constantly moving. It’s a matter of time. The forest isn’t infinitely big, so Sam can systematically search it until he finds us. This will only work though, if we aren’t constantly moving. He might take days or weeks, but he’ll find us and until that happens, we only have to stay here and survive,” Cas explained.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right…”, Dean mumbled, then his eyes fell onto the amphitere in front of them, “Can’t she lead him to us?”

She just stared at him for a moment, seemingly thinking about that request, then she simply shook her head.

“What? Why not??”, Dean inquired in confusion.

“I think she doesn’t want to leave us alone, without protection. I assume there must indeed be other creatures that are a danger for us. Also even for her it’d be hard to find Sam in an extensive forest like this,” Cas stated.

“Great. Now she’s our nanny… What about flying?”, Dean was grasping at straws, he knew that, but he had to try.

“I’m afraid her wings are not strong enough to carry her own weight with the addition of two grown men…”, Cas told him a little remorseful.

“Awesome. So we’re really stuck here.”

“I’m afraid so…”, Cas agreed, then a lopsided smile crept onto his lips as he said, “We might as well make the most of it, right?”

Beside him, Dean let out a snort, “Yeah, we’ll manage.”

When Cas turned towards him, he noticed that Dean’s eyelids were drooping. The man was barely awake and he definitely needed some rest to recover from his blood loss.

“You’re tired,” Cas stated, “You should rest.”

Dean wanted to object, tell Cas that he was fine, keep talking to him, because the truth was that he’d missed him in those hours alone. He’d missed him so much it’d hurt. And now he was here.

Cas felt Dean’s longing in his chest like he felt his own heartbeat and it was confusing, because he was right here, right next to him. It didn’t make sense… did it?

“I can still feel your longing, Dean…”, he reminded softly.

“Yeah, right, sorry,” came the weak reply.

“You should sleep,” Cas told him again and Dean had to admit that he was right.

He gave a weak nod and closed his eyes completely. He’d already slept in worse positions. If it just weren’t so damn cold… He shivered.

Now the amphitere rose from her nest and nodded towards the two men as she uncurled her body.

Cas looked at her for a moment in disbelief and she just gave him another soft nod, before slithering towards the entrance of the cave to assess the current situation.

“Dean, I think she just offered her nest to us…”

“What?”, Dean mumbled, barely awake.

“Come on, you’ll sleep better on the feathers, it’s warmer.”

Cas stood up, pulling Dean along onto the pile of old feathers. The hunter was skeptical for a moment, but he was too tired to care where he slept anyway and this was definitely better than the cold stone ground, so he laid down, closing his eyes again.

Dean shivered once more and it took merely a second of hesitation for Cas to put off his coat and drape it over Dean’s body like a blanket.

Dean immediately curled up underneath it before he asked, “Aren’t you tired too? I mean, you’re almost human, right?”

“I’m fine, I’ll watch over you,” Cas replied, but had to hold back a yawn.

“You sure?”, Dean mumbled.

“I’m sure.”

Dean hummed in acknowledgment and pulled the tan coat tighter around himself, still feeling cold under the rather thin fabric.

Another pang of longing hit Cas like a tidal wave and it was so forceful that he had to lean against the cave wall for support.

“You need to stop that…”, he mumbled as he tried to regain his composure.

“I think I can’t, sorry…”, Dean replied weakly, sounding almost sheepish.

Then he opened his apple green eyes to look up at Castiel and sighed, “Don’t be ridiculous. C’mere.”

Cas sighed deeply, finally recovering from the mix of emotions Dean’s longing always brought with it. Normally he would’ve declined such an offer ten times if he’d had to, but now he was too weakened, too tempted, too _human_ to care anymore. At this point it was hard to distinguish Dean’s longing from his own. He needed the closeness, the feeling of Dean’s warmth. Besides, he was dead tired and freezing without his coat. So he gave in, lying down beside Dean under their blanket of tan trench coat, keeping each other warm.

The hunter seemed to hesitate about something for a moment, his hand hovering in the air under the coat, then he took a deep breath and let it come to rest on Cas’ waist before he snuggled in close.

Cas felt like his heart was going to leap out of his chest. Dean was curled up against him as close as he could get and Cas ached in all the best possible ways. Dean’s warmth so close to him was slowly seeping into Cas’ bones and even his soul, his very being, letting him relax in a way he hadn’t thought possible.

After a few more moments of hesitation, he thought of Dean’s prayers and how he’d told him that he needed him and it gave him the bravery to allow himself to put an arm around Dean, pulling him even a bit closer.

Now the almost ever-present longing finally became quiet.

The amphitere came back from the cave entrance where she’d waited to give them a moment of privacy. She looked at them both where they were lying on the floor in her nest, curled up against one another, and proceeded to curl her long body around them in a protective circle. It was the safest place for them to be in this forest. No creature would dare to disturb an amphitere’s sleep, nothing could get to them, not even close. They were protected by the most powerful being in this wide forest. Nothing could harm them, they were completely safe. And closer than they’d ever been before.

“Y’know…”, Dean started quietly, “I’ve been wanting this for a long time now…”

Cas just stared at him, unable to comprehend what he’d just heard, but Dean just burrowed his nose under Cas’ chin and went on, “You mean so much to me… So much… I couldn’t stand losing you… We were separated for not even a whole day and I already missed you as hell. Please don’t ever leave me…”

Cas felt tears prickling in his eyes and he took a shaky breath, “I would never leave you, Dean…”

He tightened his grip on Dean’s back and shifted to bury his nose in the man’s neck, whispering into his skin, “I couldn’t…”

When he took a deep breath, letting Dean’s scent cloud his senses, he thought to himself, ‘ _I’m too far gone…_ ’

And as he finally succumbed to sleep, he could feel even the last remainder of his grace slip away. But it didn’t feel like loss, no actually he felt _relieved_. For the whole day he’d been holding onto it, his whole being grasping it tightly with all his strength and now he could finally let go… and rest.


	2. The Forest: Day 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SCREECHING  
> My awesome best friend [Zwetschge14](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zwetschge14) commissioned a piece of art by the wonderful [Migglangelus](http://migglangelus.tumblr.com) for me as a belated birthday present and all I can say is I love them both so much <3 *sobs into oblivion*

Castiel was the first to wake. Well, actually he wasn’t, since the amphitere was already looking out of the cave entrance, checking the weather and enjoying the first rays of sunshine that were slowly breaking through the thick clouds. But he was awake before Dean, who was still curled up against him, sleeping soundly. It’d been the most restful night he remembered ever having. Dean’s head was tucked under Cas’ chin and somehow their legs were entangled now. For a moment Castiel was overwhelmed with the storm of butterflies he could feel behind his ribcage, hormones and emotions now affecting him without barrier and he took a moment to just close his eyes and appreciate his newfound humanity. When he opened them again and looked down at Dean’s head, he couldn’t help but smile. Joy and hope and love made his heart swell inside his chest as he settled back down, not willing to give this up just yet. Soon enough, Dean’s warmth and the sound of his breathing lulled Cas back to sleep.

Dean started to shift in his sleep and soon he blinked his eyes open, finding himself pressed up against something warm that smelled like Cas. Hold on. This _was_ Cas. He was cuddled up against Cas. _Right_. Now he remembered everything. He’d been a bit out of it because of blood loss and exhaustion and so he’d apparently made something like a confession. Should he apologize? Laugh it off? Would Cas even see it as a confession? It’s not like it hadn’t all been the truth… It really had. And there were a few more confessions just waiting around the corner. Maybe he shouldn’t say anything about it just yet and see if Cas would confront him. That sounded like a good idea for now.

As he opened his eyes and pulled back slightly, he found Cas to be asleep and he couldn’t help but smile at seeing his angel — possibly ex-angel? — so relaxed and at peace.

As he started to look around, he noticed that the cave was dimly lit by the daylight that came through the entrance. The next thing he noticed was that the amphitere was staring at them with big, green eyes, as they were practically wrapped around each other in her nest. The hunter tensed reflexively, waking Cas from his light slumber and Dean felt Cas’ grip tighten around his waist as though he was scared Dean might flee. It wasn’t a groundless fear, but Dean was simply too content to move much at the present moment. Cas seemed to be just as content and the amphitere most likely didn’t even care.

“Why don’t you take a picture, it’d last longer…”, he grumbled and settled back into Cas’ embrace.

Castiel chuckled and the feathered snake made a strange sound of amusement.

They stayed like that for a few more moments, just relishing the warmth and contentment. Until suddenly Cas’ stomach growled.

Dean shifted a little to look at his face, trying to suppress a smirk and stated, “You’re hungry.”

“I haven’t eaten anything since I’ve last been human and that was years ago, Dean. I’m _starving_.”

Dean didn’t even try to hide the grin that was spreading on his face at the prospect of seeing Cas actually enjoy food again.

“So that’s it? You’re actually human now? For real?”

“Yes,” Cas answered without even the faintest hint of regret, “the last bit of my grace slipped away when I fell asleep.”

Dean wasn’t sure what to say. Should he apologize? Offer comfort? Congratulate? Should he even say anything? He didn’t know, so he settled on a simple, but heartfelt, “Okay.”

Their faces were mere inches apart and Cas had never wanted to kiss Dean so badly, but he was also hyperaware that they had an audience and what if Dean hadn’t even meant what he’d said last night? He’d been under the influence of severe blood loss, what if that was all?

“We should look for water,” he announced silently with a little bit of regret as he untangled himself from Dean and stood up.

Dean was glad that Cas couldn’t feel his longing anymore, because he was pretty sure this would’ve felt like a punch in the gut. He pulled the trench coat tighter around himself until it covered half of his face. It smelled like Cas. God, he had it bad for the guy…

Looking up again, he saw Cas standing in front of the amphitere, his right hand gently touching the creature’s snout.

“What is this? How to train your dragon?”, he commented.

Cas didn’t even turn around as he replied, “Well it’s certainly not a traditional dragon slayer story, since I definitely won’t kill her and I also wouldn’t exactly call you a damsel in distress…”

Dean snorted, “Touché.”

Now he sat up fully to watch their interaction for a long moment, a fond smile on his lips and adoration in his heart. Cas had come so far in the many years since they’d first met. He’d become so human, yet he was still himself in a way neither Dean nor Sam could quite understand. And oh how Dean loved him. He loved him with all his heart, all his soul. He loved him for so long now and he somehow just kept loving him more and more.

“Should we name her?”, he finally broke the silence.

“Does she need a name?”, Cas asked a little absentmindedly.

“Well, it’d be easier than calling her amphitere all the time. We don’t know how long we’re gonna be here,” he shrugged, “If you don’t wanna name her, I’m gonna call her Molly.”

“What, why-”

“Molly.”

Cas thought for a moment, “What about Quetzalcoatl?”

“That’s a Mayan god,” Dean noted.

“Who looks like an amphitere,” Cas added.

Dean just crossed his arms in response.

Cas rolled his eyes and asked, “How do you know Quetzalcoatl anyway?”

“Dude, I _read_.”

They fell into silence again for a few seconds until Dean announced, “We’re not gonna name her after a Mayan god who’s _male_ by the way, she needs a better name than that.”

“Actually there's some sort of female version for Quetzalcoatl — Quetzalxochitl. It means something along the lines of ‘precious flower’ or ‘queen’.”

“Yeah, but no one except you can pronounce that,” Dean accused.

“Fine, but we’re not gonna name her Molly either.”

“Fair enough.”

They thought for another moment, when suddenly Cas had an idea, “What about Tanith?”

Dean looked up at him, “That name sounds familiar, help me a little here…?”

“In the Phoenician myth it’s the name of a goddess of love, the moon and the stars and it means ‘serpent lady’,” Cas explained.

Dean thought it over for a second. “Tanith… not bad.”

Cas beamed at him, then turned around to the newly named amphitere, “Would you like to be called Tanith?”

She cooed softly and nudged him with her big head.

Cas chuckled, “Is that a yes?”

She cooed again, this time giving a short nod.

“Well, then it’s settled. Your name is Tanith now,” Dean said from where he was getting up now, holding the trench coat in his hands, not sure what to do with it, but also not willing to leave it lying on the ground. He stood there, holding it awkwardly for a moment, until he decided to give it back to its rightful owner.

“Here,” he said, holding it out to Cas, “Thanks for… um… keeping me warm.”

Cas looked at Dean, then at the coat, then back at Dean and turned thoughtful for a moment, “I think you should keep it for now. You’re still recovering from your blood loss, you need it more than I do.”

“What? No, I can’t wear your coat. It’s yours. It’d… I dunno… be weird, I guess.”

Cas tilted his head with a slight squint, “Why would it? It’s not like you have never worn it before.”

Dean felt heat crawl up his neck and face. So Cas had seen _that_ memory too.

“Yeah, um…”, he shifted a little uncomfortably, “It’s just… I don’t know… That coat, it… it’s like a part of you. You’ve had it, or similar ones, ever since I first met you. Whenever I see someone wearing a trench coat, I think of you, y’know?”

Why the hell had he just said that? Could he be any more obvious?! _Jesus_.

Cas’ eyes just widened slightly with wonder, “You do?”

Dean rubbed his neck a little, “Yeah. See? It’d be weird if I wore it instead of you.”

But Cas just smiled lightly at him, “No, it wouldn’t. I’d like to see you wear it. It’s as much a part of me as you are…”

Now Dean just gaped at him. Oh no, had he upset him? Had he revealed too much? He’d just started to hope there could be more between him and Dean…

But as always, Dean didn’t seize to surprise him. This time he did so, by closing his mouth after a few moments and then actually giving Cas a soft smile that made his heart pick up its pace. Maybe there really was hope…?

Dean averted his eyes, trying to collect himself and realized a bit too late that he absentmindedly held the trench coat like it was something close to a treasure.

He cleared his throat and said a weak, “Thank you.” Then he put the coat on, his ripped jacket long discarded in some corner of the cave.

Cas took his sweet time to appreciate seeing Dean in his coat. It was an odd sight, but definitely a sight to behold. The coat was covered in dirt and bloodstains and there was a rip in it, but there was something about seeing Dean wearing it, that made it hard for Cas to take his eyes off of him.

Dean started to shift under Cas’ intense gaze, “Shouldn't we leave already?”

Now Cas finally managed to look somewhere else, “Yes, sorry, I was… lost in thought.”

Dean raised his eyebrow at him, but didn’t comment on it as they both walked towards the cave entrance. Suddenly Tanith sprang into action, slithering in front of them and giving a questioning coo.

Cas and Dean shared a look and then the former angel explained, “We need to search for water to avoid dehydration.”

In response, she cooed understandingly and turned around to leave the cave as well.

“What is she doing?”, Dean asked in confusion.

“I’m not sure…”

Upon realizing that they weren’t following her, she turned towards them, huffed through her nostrils and made a strange head movement to indicate a specific direction.

“I think she wants us to follow her,” Cas said and she replied with a low, slightly sarcastic sounding coo.

So she led them through the forest, the autumn sun shining high above their heads. They had apparently slept until about noon. Not entirely surprising, considering Dean’s blood loss and Cas having lost his grace. Still Dean marveled at having gotten such a good night’s sleep with Cas by his side. That couldn’t have had anything to do with it, right? Probably right.

It was warmer than the day before. Not by a lot, but noticeably. The wind had lessened significantly, probably because the storm had passed by completely. Everything was wet, the trees, the bushes, the ground. The earth underneath their feet was soaked with rainwater and in some areas it was muddy.

It wasn’t hard to notice that Cas was cold without his coat. Dean wasn’t exactly warm either, but Cas was shivering. After a moment of hesitation, Dean wrapped an arm around Cas’ shoulders, pulling him close and mumbled, “You’re cold.”

They’d cuddled last night, damn it, and there was just no way that didn’t mean anything, so to hell with it all.

Cas made a noise of surprise in the back of his throat, but within only a matter of seconds, he relaxed, leaning ever so slightly into Dean.

They kept walking like that for the rest of the short way, soon arriving at a small spring that formed a rivulet, which presumably led into a bigger river somewhere.

Tanith was the first to take a sip from it, showing them it was perfectly safe to drink. So they drank. Using their hands as cups, they quickly gulped down as much of the clear, cold liquid as they could. It felt like balm for their dry throats, telling them that, with Tanith watching over them, everything was going to be alright. They were fine and they were safe. They would get home soon.

On the way back to the cave, they walked in silence, arms around each other to keep warm. Well, that was _one_ reason. Tanith seemed to be unsettled, like she’d have to do something she didn’t want to.

When Cas’ stomach growled loudly, Dean frowned, “We should get you something to eat, buddy.”

Tanith huffed and made a low sound, then nudged them into the cave’s entrance with her snout.

“She wants us to stay here, right? She must be hungry too,” Dean thought out loud.

“Yes, Dean. You’re starting to understand her.” Cas seemed to be a bit proud as he looked at him.

Dean chucked, “Yeah, she’s actually pretty good at communicating, even though, y’know… she can’t _speak_.”

He made a step forward and reached out to her. When he touched her, she suddenly puffed her feathers and he reflexively flinched, which caused Cas to chuckle lowly.

“Shut up,” Dean tried to say seriously, but he was laughing.

Tanith lowered her head to give him a light nudge towards the cave again and when they were both inside, she slithered away into the forest, leaving them alone.

“And what do we do now?”, Dean asked.

Cas made some kind of half shrug, “We wait here.”

“What, seriously? We can’t just sit around and do nothing, we gotta… we gotta make it easier for Sam to find us. Somehow.”

“Hm…”, Cas turned thoughtful for a moment, “I suppose we could tie something colorful into a treetop where it could easily be seen…?”

Dean considered that suggestion, “Yeah, that could work. We can use my shirt.”

He quickly slipped out of the trench coat and then took off his plaid shirt. Cas swallowed thickly, not exactly sure where to look. Dean always managed to have that effect on him…

Cas helped Dean to climb onto the most suitable tree for their purpose and the hunter fixed the cloth to a branch where it could be seen best, even from longer distances.

When Dean had climbed back down and jumped the last bit onto the ground, Cas immediately held out the trench coat for him. He’d left it down there to avoid getting caught somewhere in the branches. But just as Dean took the coat and wanted to put it on, they heard a squelching noise as though someone — or some _thing_ — had stepped into mud. Both of them instantly froze. They weren’t alone anymore.

One shared look and both of them knew what was about to happen. Something had decided to have them for dinner and it would soon deeply regret that decision. They didn’t have weapons, but they had mostly recovered from their superficial wounds and were definitely able to fight. No monster on earth wanted to encounter two Winchesters who were able and willing to fight. And of course Cas was a Winchester, had been for a long time now, Dean making sure he knew that at every possible opportunity.

They took up fighting stance, backs turned towards each other, so close they were touching. They didn’t know where the creature was around them, but that way it couldn’t sneak up on them from behind. Next to them on the ground Cas noticed a couple stones and a rather stable looking tree branch. It was better than no weapons at all.

“Dean,” Cas whispered to catch his attention and as Dean followed Cas’ gaze, he instantly knew what he meant. Dean gave a nod and they simultaneously bent down to collect the bigger stones and the branch, immediately straightening up afterwards. There was another sound to their left and they turned their heads towards it, Dean facing it fully. A dog-like creature stepped out of the bushes, gray skin with a bit of fur, spines growing out of its back, long teeth bared and yellow eyes staring at them. A chupacabra.

“Of course…”, Cas mumbled, “Sam killed one, but there were two. I should’ve noticed that the lair was too big for just one…”

“Good thing that it ain’t something else, they’re comparatively easy to kill…”, Dean mumbled back.

“Yes, but I’m not sure these provisory weapons will suffice…”

Dean didn’t say anything more to that. The chupacabra let out a growl right before it charged. It didn’t get too far though, because Dean threw one of the big stones, hitting it right at the head. It yelped and stumbled back, but didn’t give up just yet. Circling around them, it kept growling.

Suddenly Cas had an idea, “Dean, the coat. They mostly rely on their eyesight while hunting their prey.”

“Got it,” Dean replied with a firm nod.

This time when the creature charged again from the other side, Cas and Dean quickly traded places and Dean threw the trench coat onto the monster’s head, making it essentially blind. While it was busy trying to shake off the offending piece of clothing, Cas used the hard branch to hit it in the side and even managed to stab it, causing an ugly, bleeding wound. The chupacabra drew back a little and Dean and Cas used the opportunity to run. They ran to the cave, but didn’t know what to do next, since the cave was a dead-end and not exactly a safe place for that matter. Meanwhile the monster had finally managed to get rid of the coat and came sprinting towards them again. Another skilled throw from Dean, another hit. The creature let out a screech of pure rage and was about to charge again, Cas raising his arm to throw another stone, when all of a sudden Tanith landed between the monster and its chosen prey. She dropped her own prey to the ground beside her and stared the chupacabra down with a fiery gaze, huge wings spread in a daring manner, but also in a way to protect the two men behind her. The chupacabra growled and she hissed loudly at it in response. Slowly it started to move to the side. For a moment it seemed like it was about to back off completely, but then Dean noticed it staring at them and he shouted, “Cas!”

Without thinking twice, Cas threw the stone and ended up hitting the creature mid-jump as it had tried to attack. Another evidence of how flawlessly they were working together, like a well oiled machinery. As the chupacabra attempted to stand up again, Tanith made good on her earlier threat, grabbing the monster between her jaws and lifting it off the ground. No one was going to hurt these humans. They were her friends now and they were under her protection. Nothing and no one would harm them, she’d make sure of it. Cas and Dean watched in astonishment as Tanith lifted the chupacabra and shook her head violently, biting down even harder. They could hear the cracking of bones. Then with another powerful neck movement, she hurled the creature against a thick tree. It dropped to the ground with a thump, silently whining for a moment until it stopped breathing altogether.

As soon as she was sure the monster was dead, her posture changed back into the caretaker they’d come to know, instantly turning towards the two men to check for injuries and if they were okay. Surprisingly, they were. One doesn’t fight a chupacabra with nothing but sticks and stones every day and one even less likely fights a chupacabra with nothing but sticks and stones and doesn’t get majorly injured, or dies for that matter. But somehow, they were fine. Maybe one or two additional scratches, but those hardly stood out from the rest of their minor wounds.

Cas looked from the dead chupacabra to Tanith and said, “Thank you.”

Dean gave her a nod of thanks, before he marched over to where the trench coat was lying on the ground and she cooed softly as a reply. He picked up the tan piece of clothing, brushed as much dirt off of it as he could, draped it over his shoulders and returned to the cave entrance.

Only now he took a second to look at what Tanith had brought with her from her hunt. A dead deer was lying on the ground next to them, accompanied by a smaller animal, also a mammal. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be a rabbit.

As she noticed that now both men were staring at her prey with interest, she picked up the dead rabbit and placed it in front of them.

Dean just stared at it for a moment, before looking up at her, “You- is that… for us?”

She cooed almost cheerfully as she puffed her feathers and gave a small nod. Dean looked over at Cas who was staring at her in mild awe, then he turned back to her with a grin and said, “You’re awesome.” She puffed her feathers in pride.

 

Luckily Dean hadn’t lost his lighter in all of this madness, so he was relatively quick to set up a small fire with the rather dry wood they’d managed to find. It was placed just far enough away from the cave entrance to keep the smoke from floating into the cave, but still close enough so they could sit comfortably on dry ground that wasn’t muddy. While the rabbit was being grilled above the flames, Tanith already started to eat her deer. The dead chupacabra was almost forgotten and a sense of calm settled around them. Not just for the fact that Tanith had her long tail curled around them and for their little bonfire right in front of the cave.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, until Dean suddenly chuckled, “Remember all those years ago, when you walked into that barn, looking really intimidating?”

Cas didn’t look up from where he was watching the flames, but Dean could see the slight upwards curve of his mouth.

“Yes, I remember that.”

“At that time I could’ve never imagined ending up here one day. With you.”

A small chuckle from the ex-angel, “Me neither. I wouldn’t have believed that one day I could fall and be entirely happy about it. I wouldn’t even have thought I’d ever feel emotions…”

Dean chuckled again, “Yeah, a lot was different back then. We’ve come a long way together, been through a lot of shit and I can’t even bring myself to regret it, because right now… the world isn’t ending, no one is cursed and as soon as Sammy finds us, we’re all together…”, he shrugged, “I’m happy.”

Now Cas looked at him, his insanely blue eyes smiling, “So am I, Dean.”

They spent the rest of the time the rabbit took to be cooked talking about the past, the years they’d spent together, laughing about anecdotes and even filling in some blanks.

A lot had happened in the past year. Dean had somehow snuck out of the closet as bisexual, which had been a surprise to no one, but made Sam proud nonetheless. Jack had moved out to share an apartment with Claire, who was kind of his sister in a way, living a semi-normal life now. And Cas had, upon realizing his slow and unstoppable descent into humanity, decided to stay at the bunker for good and become a real, actual hunter. Mary continued hunting on her own, stopping by every so often to visit. She was proud of her boys. The world wasn’t ending for once. There was no impending doom. It was quiet, peaceful. The best time they’d had since their childhood. And this time it seemed like it was going to stay that way.

By the time the rabbit was cooked, Tanith had almost finished with her own ‘dinner’. With her snout covered in blood, she looked for the first time like the apex-predator she truly was in this forest.

“Man, I feel like I haven’t eating anything in _days_ ,” Dean mumbled as he ripped one of the hind legs from the cooked rabbit.

Cas raised an eyebrow at him, “Dean, I haven’t eaten in _years_.”

Dean stilled, turning to look at Cas, “Right. Here.” He held out the leg and Cas took it with a tentative, “Thanks.”

Dean took the remaining hind leg for himself, not starting to eat yet, because he was busy watching Cas taking his first bite. The fallen angel closed his eyes and moaned around a mouthful, making Dean swallow thickly. He so desperately wanted to hear that sound again, but next time he wanted to be the reason for it.

Dean was surprised by how steady his voice sounded as he said, “You really missed eating, huh?”

Cas swallowed his second bite and answered, “No, I missed _tasting_. I’m not exactly looking forward to the rest of the digestion process, but I’ll get used to it. It’s not my first time anymore and now I won’t have to adjust on my own.”

A flash of guilt squeezed Dean’s heart for a moment, “Yeah, this time will be better. I’m here for you, okay? Whatever you need.” Then he smiled and added, “After you told us you were falling, I actually made a list of things you should try. It mainly consists of different foods, but… I thought it’d be fun, y’know?”

Now a small smile made its way onto Cas’ face, “I’d really like that,” then in a slightly teasing tone he said, “Will you cook for me?”

Dean gave him a lopsided grin, “If you want me to.” Punctuated with a wink.

Cas chuckled lightly and took another bite of food. They ate mostly in silence, the only real sound being the cracking of the fire and the occasional little moan from Cas, both at finally being able to properly taste again and at getting food into his growling stomach. Dean ended up eating really slowly, because he couldn’t help staring at Cas the whole time. He couldn’t imagine what it must be like to be able to taste again after such a long time. Cas certainly seemed to be happy about it. Dean didn’t see Cas look happy often enough, so he stared. If Cas noticed, he didn’t say a word about it.

“Y’know what? When we’re back home, I’m gonna make burgers for all of us,” Dean announced all of a sudden, causing Cas to look at him, eyes widened in anticipation.

Dean couldn’t hold back his laugh, “I knew you’d like that.”

Cas’ cheeks reddened slightly, “I heard Sam and Mary saying that you make really good burgers and I wanted to try them since then…”

Dean smiled, “Then it’s settled. Soon as we’re home, I’ll make the best burgers I can manage.”

The look that Cas gave him then, was nothing short of adoration.

After finishing their meal, the two kept sitting next to each other in comfortable silence for a while. Cas’ right hand was resting on his now pleasantly full belly, a content and serene smile on his lips. Oh how Dean wanted to put that smile there more often and see it directed at him. He’d never wanted to hold this beautiful man in his arms more. But the way Cas was leaning ever so slightly into his personal space, gave him the courage to say what he wanted to say for a while now.

“I meant it, y’know…”, he mumbled and as Cas looked at him questioningly, he went on, “What I said last night. I meant it. All of it.”

There was an audible intake of breath from Cas, who was watching Dean carefully with wide eyes.

“I can’t- I couldn’t lose you. You mean too much to me…”

And Cas understood that Dean was also telling him with that why he hadn’t said anything earlier. He’d been afraid. And now he was asking Cas to say something. Or do something.

So Cas did the only thing he could do in that moment. He leaned in and pressed his lips to Dean’s. But as the full impact of what he’d just done hit him, nervousness got the better of him and he immediately withdrew. Dean was startled as he felt surprisingly soft lips against his own, too surprised to react in that moment and then Cas already retreated, leaving Dean a chance to back out. But he didn’t want to. Not anymore. And this short touch of lips wasn’t nearly enough.

Dean chased Cas’ lips and with a hand cupping his jaw, he pulled him back in, sealing their lips more firmly. Cas made a strange sound of surprise mixed with delight in the back of his throat and closed his eyes, kissing Dean back with every bit of joy, affection and love he had to offer.

Dean’s right hand was still gently cupping his jaw when his other hand came up to rest on his waist. Cas wrapped one arm around strong shoulders, hand fisted in Dean’s shirt, pulling him even closer, while he buried the other hand in Dean’s hair. And what was Dean supposed to do other than melting into it…

Cas felt like he was flying, the feeling of kissing Dean making him soar higher than the clouds in the sky. He sighed into the kiss, letting the hand on Dean’s back slide down to his waist.

When they had to part for air, Dean rested his forehead against Cas’ and looked into his eyes, his own green ones shining.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a looooooong time…”, he whispered against Cas’ lips.

“So have I,” came the answer and Dean couldn’t help kissing the corner of his fallen angel’s mouth. Cas beamed at him and his heart made a backflip inside his chest.

When their lips met again, Dean was blissfully aware of how they’d both leaned in at exactly the same time. They sunk into each other’s arms, slowly lying down on the ground, never breaking the kiss. Tanith politely turned her head away. To Dean’s surprise it stayed very soft and gentle, there was almost no heat in their kisses, only emotion. They were pouring out their hearts and presenting them to the other, offering them up. They hadn’t belonged to them anymore for a long time now anyway.

Minutes upon minutes passed, which they spent wrapped up in each other’s arms, legs entangled and lips sealed.

Some time later, they moved to sit under a tree, leaning against the trunk. Dean had his right arm wrapped around Cas’ shoulders, while Cas had his left arm slung around Dean’s waist. Cas’ head was resting on Dean’s shoulder and Dean leaned his own head against Cas’, while they were sitting there, sharing the trench coat that was now draped over both of their shoulders, and watching the sunset.

Neither of them had felt this warm since they were lost in this forest. Then again, they weren’t really lost anymore, they were found.

 

Sam was reaching the point of desperation. He was wandering through this fucking forest for a whole day now and there was still no sign of Dean or Cas, dammit! He didn’t even know if they were okay, or even still alive. Immediately after the storm had passed, he’d left the abandoned cabin where he’d spent the night to continue his search, but no luck yet. All traces he could’ve followed had been washed away. He tried to not assume the worst, oh he tired, but the chupacabra’s lair was too big for only one creature, so there had to be another one somewhere, roaming this forest. At least he’d been able to take care of the one in the den fairly quickly after Cas had left. Sam hoped Dean and Cas had at least found each other by now. They had better chances when they were together. He’d find them somehow, even if he had to search this forest for days on end.

It was getting dark now, he could see the sun setting, bathing the sky in a soft orange-red glow. The colors of the leaves that were still left on the trees and the sky above them almost looked like they were blending together. Orange, red and yellow. It looked a bit like the trees were sustaining the sky with their strong upwards growing branches. It was beautiful.

Sam was carrying Dean’s gun and Cas’ angel blade with him since the first chupacabra had attacked them. He couldn’t wait to hand them back to their rightful owners. Dean planned to give Cas a gun of his own soon. He’d already bought it. It was similar to Dean’s, because Dean had taught Cas how to shoot and Cas liked to shoot with Dean’s gun. Sam had walked in on them practicing multiple times and more often than not, Dean’d been correcting Cas’ shooting stance, standing far closer than necessary. ‘Whatever happened to personal space, Dean?’, Sam had teased his older brother, who’d only responded with a glare and a subtle blush. Sam really hoped those two would get their shit together soon. Well, first and foremost he hoped he’d find them in one piece…

Leaning against an old oak tree for support, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. If only he had someone who could help him, this would be so much easier.

Wait. His eyes shot open with a realization. An old oak tree. Dryads were nature spirits who live in oak trees, preferably old ones. The dryads had been very thankful for their help, so maybe they’d help Sam now in return.

He took a step away from the tree and stared at it for a moment, not sure how to approach this, then he raised his hand and simply knocked.

“Um… Sorry to disturb. I’m not even sure there’s someone in there, but… I need help. If someone’s in here… If you can hear me, please, I need to find my brother and my friend. They could be in danger. I- I can’t find them, please…”

The tree remained silent. Sam was about to turn away and continue his search like before, but suddenly he caught movement in the corner of his eye and turned back to look at the tree again. His gaze was met by a pair of forest green eyes as the bark of the tree morphed into the face of a woman. One of the dryads. She’d heard him after all.

A soft smile was visible on her wooden features as she looked at Sam and reached with one hand out of the tree trunk, pointing to her right.

Sam returned her smile gratefully, “Thank you.”

Then he wandered off into the direction she’d given him, while she disappeared inside her tree again.

He walked and walked for minutes, not even sure if he was still walking into the right direction. When he suddenly heard the quiet gurgling of water, he ran off into the direction of that sound. There was a small rivulet running across the earth and as he wandered upstream, he found a spring there. Quickly he filled up his water bottle and looked around. There were footprints in the mud. So they’d been here and they were apparently together, but where were they _now_? Sam tried to trace the footprints, but there were so many leaves and stones on the ground that he ended up losing them, no matter how hard he tried.

Sam sighed leaning his forehead against a tree. He was so close now, he just _had_ to find them.

All of a sudden, there was a warm breeze, blowing Sam’s hair into his face and in the corner of his eye, he saw a lot of leaves falling down a single tree all at once, a couple yards to his right. They were dancing in the wind, swirling around in what almost looked like a pattern until they started to form the silhouette of a woman. Now Sam realized that the leaves had fallen from an oak tree. It was hard to see a face in the never ending swirl of orange leaves, but she was clearly looking at Sam, gave a nod and then stretched out her arm, pointing to her left.

Sam breathed out in relief, “Thank you.” Then he continued to walk. She watched him for another moment, making sure he was on the right track, then the leaves started to fall slowly to the ground, some of them getting caught in the wind and sailing away through the air.

He walked for another few minutes, before something caught his eyes, high up in a tree. It was a piece of clothing that fluttered in the breeze. A plaid piece of clothing. After a moment, Sam recognized it as Dean’s shirt. But what was that doing up there in a tree? He climbed up to inspect it further and it seemed to have been tied around the branch deliberately. Sam took it with him as he climbed back down and looked around. This had to be some kind of sign, they must be here somewhere.

He didn’t get disappointed as the soft noise of quiet voices reached his ears over the faint rustling of the wind playing with the leaves on the trees. Relief flooded his system at the familiar voices and he followed them. As he reached a small clearing in front of a cave, he found them sitting under a tree, the space between them almost nonexistent and they were… watching the sunset?

“Dean,” he called out and his older brother instantly stopped the hushed conversation he was having with Cas to look around at Sam and grin. Cas turned around too and smiled, brighter than Sam had ever seen.

Suddenly his eyes caught movement in the direction of the cave and when he looked there, his eyes widened in horror. There was a giant snake curled up only a few feet away from Dean and Castiel. It was covered in feathers and had two huge wings. An amphitere, he’d read about them.

Without thinking twice, he drew his gun and stepped forward, trying to shield his brother and friend. The creature reacted immediately, raising its big head, looming over Sam as it hissed at him in warning.

Dean was up from where he’d been sitting in an instant, placing himself directly between his younger brother and the amphitere, holding out his hands at both of them.

“Whoa, it’s okay! It’s okay. Both of you calm down! Sam, put that gun back where it came from or so help me.”

“What? I- The creature- What are you doing?!”, Sam stammered, trying to comprehend.

“Sam, put the gun down, she’s not evil.”

“She?”

Now Cas joined Dean where he was standing, “Yes, Sam. She saved us.” Then he pointed towards the tree line, where Sam saw a dead chupacabra lying in a pool of blood.

He still didn’t quite understand, but he put the gun away and the amphitere seemed to relax.

Looking back at Dean, he pulled his big brother into a hug.

“Heya, Sammy,” Dean mumbled, gently patting his back.

As soon as they parted, Sam proceeded to hug Cas as well, almost crushing him in the process.

“Now, start from the beginning, please,” Sam asked them after giving Dean his shirt back.

Dean nodded while he put it on, “Well, while the chupacabra dragged me through the forest, Tanith here,” he gestured at the amphitere, “decided to help me. She snatched me from the chupacabra and brought me here to her lair, where she watched over me until Cas found me.”

“Amphitere are kind creatures, they don’t harm people, so I instantly knew that she was just trying to help,” Cas explained further.

“Yeah,” Dean agreed, “Then Cas fixed the wound on my leg and the next day she killed the chupacabra that tried to attack us.”

Sam listened intently to their explanation, always nodding along and when they were finished, he let the information sink in for a moment.

“Well, I think there’s an apology due then,” Sam said looking at Tanith, who was watching him with interest.

“Go on then, she can understand you,” Cas told him.

“Really? Okay, um… Sorry that I pointed a gun at you… and thanks for saving them.”

Tanith cooed softly, accepting his somewhat awkward apology, then she lowered her head and sniffed him for a moment. Sam tensed reflexively, but relaxed again as soon as he realized what she was doing.

Dean chuckled, “You can touch her if you want, she doesn’t bite.”

Sam hesitated for a second, but the curiosity won and he reached out and brushed his fingers against the feathers, his eyes going wide. They were so soft! He buried his fingers in the feathers and as she cooed lowly, he could feel the soft rumble against his fingers.

“This is amazing,” he breathed with a look of wonder on his face, “I’ve read about these creatures, but not even the Men of Letters knew much about them.”

“They are pretty hard to find, since they live deep in forests and mostly hide from humans. And since they don’t attack anyone, hunters never have anything to do with them,” Cas said.

“Makes sense,” Sam murmured absentmindedly, still fascinated by the creature in front of him.

They spent another couple minutes talking about the events that had occurred while they’d been separated. Dean and Cas left out the more private parts of course.

“My phone still works, so we should be able to find our way to the Impala without problems, but we should leave soon, before I run out of battery,” Sam told them.

“Yeah, it’s already gettin’ dark again,” Dean agreed.

“I suppose it’s time to say goodbye,” Cas noted, looking at Tanith.

“Right, it’s not like we can take you with us…”, Dean said, turning towards her as well.

She looked at them both, lowering her head in a single nod and cooed lowly. It had a sad tone to it, but also something like resignation. She’d known they’d have to leave eventually, but that didn’t mean the parting would be any easier.

Both of them reached out to her and ran their fingers through her soft feathers and she closed her eyes. When they drew back, she let out a hardly audible coo.

“Hey, y’know what?”, Dean started, trying to lift the mood a bit, “We could visit.”

Cas turned to look at him with surprise and hope on his face and Dean went on, “Sam, can you save this location on your GPS so we could come back here?”

“Um… Yeah, I think I could.”

“Neat, then do it.”

As soon as Sam set to work, Dean turned to Tanith again, “See? We’ll visit. Promise.”

Now it almost looked as though her eyes were smiling and she nuzzled them with her head once more, before they finally left.

 

For several minutes they walked through the forest in comfortable silence, then suddenly Sam remembered something, “Oh right! I still got your weapons!”

He fumbled for the angel blade and the gun, before holding them out for their owners to take, “Sorry, I couldn’t find your phones though.”

“No problem. Thanks, Sam,” Dean said as he took his beloved gun, mumbling, “Good to have ya back…” Then he put it into its holster where it belonged.

Cas thanked him as well after taking the blade, then he thought for a moment, unsure where to put it, before he settled on sticking it to his belt. He’d have to get a holster or something for it soon. As Sam watched him doing that, he was suddenly hyperaware of what they’d told him earlier. Cas was human. Permanently so.

“Cas, um… so, you’re human now, huh?”, he started to talk while they continued their journey through the forest, all the while following the direction Sam’s phone was showing them.

“Yes,” was the only answer he got. He wasn’t sure if he should keep digging or drop the topic, maybe it was still to early… But when Cas had told them that he was slowly falling, he’d assured them it was fine… On the other hand, now that he was actually stumbling down that path instead of just having it in sight, that might’ve changed. Sam needed to know. He needed to know if his friend was okay and if not, how he could help him to cope.

“How, um… are you feelin’ with that? Are you…”, he started awkwardly, but didn’t know how to finish that sentence, so it just sort of hung in the air like that.

Dean raised an eyebrow at him, “Really, Sam? Can’t you keep your sharin’ and carin’ shit to yourself at least until we’re somewhere warm?”

Cas just looked at him for a moment and Sam shrugged without looking away from the screen of his phone. Dean rolled his eyes and kept quiet.

“I already told you, I’m feeling good and I am adjusting just fine.” Sam looked up from his phone for a moment. It sounded genuine and Sam had to see the look on Cas’ face.

The former angel actually looked fine. His eyes weren’t tired, they were alive in a way Sam had never seen before. His posture was relaxed and there was the hint of a barely-there smile tugging on the corner of his lips. Cas had never looked more serene. It was as though he’d finally found peace.

“All right, okay.” That was enough for him, he’d never ask again.

They walked for another minute in silence before Sam spoke again.

“Hey, by the way, what were you guys even doing when I showed up?”

Dean’s eyes widened slightly, but he managed to keep it from being too obvious. He couldn't exactly tell his brother that they’d been cuddling while watching the sunset. Of course he would tell Sam about the newest development between Cas and him, but if he told Sam they were _cuddling_ and _watching the sunset_ , he’d never hear the end of it. So he settled for kind of a half-truth.

“We were looking at the sunset, just relaxing a bit.”

Now Sam looked at him and narrowed his eyes, “You were… relaxing? I’ve been looking for you for the whole day! Even longer actually, because of yesterday, when I killed a chupacabra by the way!”

“Yeah well, we’ve had a rough day too, Sam!”, Dean defended, “Cas has been running through the forest for hours, while I was dragged across the ground and almost bled out, then we nearly froze to death, Cas became human and then we almost got killed again by the second chupacabra!”, he paused for a moment for dramatic effect, then added, “And it’s not like we did nothing, we put my shirt into a tree to make it easier for you to find us…”

Sam gave his brother a bitchface, but went silent for a moment. Maybe they _had_ deserved some time to relax.

“Okay, you have a point…”, he admitted with a sigh, “But since when do you watch sunsets? Usually you’d just… take a nap.”

“I wanted to,” Cas said, “I never got to appreciate it before, never took the time… And a sunset is infinitely more beautiful in the colors the human eye can perceive instead of the entire spectrum.”

There was a light tinge of pink to Cas’ cheeks, but that was probably from the cold.

Sam looked at him for another moment, then mumbled, “Okay, I get it…”

He fell silent again and stayed silent for the rest of the way to the Impala.

When they reached the car, Sam was already about to go to the passenger side, when Dean handed him the keys. The younger Winchester just stared at him for a moment, utterly dumbfounded and Dean explained, “I’m too tired to drive right now and I don’t wanna risk scratching her.”

Sam nodded and got into the driver’s seat. How weirdly responsible of his brother. Not exactly usual, but that didn’t mean Sam couldn’t appreciate it. What _really_ confused him was when Dean suddenly got into the backseat with Cas, leaving the passenger seat empty.

Sam raised an eyebrow at his older brother, who just shot him a stern look and commanded, “Don't ask.”

Now both of Sam’s eyebrows wandered up his forehead, but he kept his mouth shut. Dean apparently had his reasons and he refused to talk about them. Sam knew that prodding would be of no use now, not with how sternly his older brother had told him to shut it. If it was important, Dean would tell him at some point. That was a lesson they’d learned over the years: don’t keep important information to yourself. It actually worked fairly well by now.

So Sam said nothing while he put the key into the ignition and started the car and he also said nothing during the short drive to their motel. What Sam didn’t see, was that Dean and Cas weren’t just sitting there next to each other on the backseat and staring out the window, they were quietly holding hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find the art on Tumblr [here](http://migglangelus.tumblr.com/post/176996513081/birthday-gift-commission-for-nera-solani-from).


	3. The Motel: The Aftermath

They soon reached the motel and shuffled into their shared room and Dean immediately flopped onto his bed, frowning when he realized that he stained the sheets with blood and mud. Some of their wounds had come open again.  
Sam sighed and told them both, “Go shower, then I’ll stitch up the worst of it.”  
Castiel and Dean started to peel off their dirty, ripped clothing, immediately feeling some sort of relief. Dean took the first shower, quick and efficient, then Cas went into the bathroom while Dean was being stitched up. When the former angel emerged again, wearing his most comfortable sweat pants, his chest bare, Dean’s eyes lingered on every inch of visible skin. Not that Sam would notice, he was too busy with a slash on his brother’s back. Knowing that, Dean took his time to stare shamelessly and Cas actually seemed to like it, staring back at Dean who was only clad in his underwear, since Sam had stitched up a few gashes on his legs.  
“Okay, done. Now you, Cas,” Sam announced, waving at Cas to come over.  
“You can go shower now, Dean can stitch me up too,” Cas offered.  
Sam looked from Cas to Dean to himself. His clothing was dirty, as was his hair. In fact the only part of him that was clean were his hands, because he’d washed them before picking up the needle. He really wanted to shower.  
Getting up from the bed, he gave Cas a slight smile, “Thanks, Cas. Be careful, Dean!”  
“Shut up, Sam, of course I’m careful!”, Dean shot back. It would be the first time Cas had to get stitched up. He couldn’t be anything but careful.  
The moment the bathroom door fell shut behind Sam, Cas’ lips were on Dean’s, taking his breath away. And the fact that Cas would already so easily take what was rightfully his, sent a thrill down Dean’s spine and caused warmth to spread inside his ribcage. But the kiss ended too soon with the knowledge that Sam was just a door away and wouldn’t shower for all that long.  
Dean pressed another quick kiss to the corner of Cas’ mouth and said, “Turn around.”  
Cas did as he was told, sitting crosslegged between Dean’s thighs, with his back turned to the other man. Dean was relieved as he saw that Cas was a lot better off than him, only a few long scratches across his skin, most of them on his back.  
He carefully traced the biggest slash with a finger, “I’m gonna start with this one, okay?”  
Cas just nodded. Dean picked up the needle, cleaned it thoroughly and threaded it before setting to work. The moment the needle breached the skin for the first time, Cas immediately tensed up. It was a reflex, Dean knew, but it would only hurt him more that way.  
Dean moved his hand to Cas’ side, gently stroking up and down where the skin was whole, “Ssh, relax. You need to relax or this’ll hurt even more…”  
Cas did his best to relax, but the feeling of metal piercing his skin was so very unpleasant. The next time the needle breached his skin, he tensed up just the same.  
“Relax, Cas,” Dean whispered and on a whim pressed a soft kiss to the nape of his neck. Castiel deflated visibly, letting out a small hum of appreciation. It did the trick, he was a lot more relaxed now.  
Dean continued like that, alternating between stitching up Cas’ wounds and pressing gentle kisses to his shoulders and neck. The former angel had never been so thoroughly relaxed.  
By the time Sam walked out of the bathroom fully clothed, they still weren’t done yet. The second the door swung open, Dean stopped his little ministrations in favor of assessing his work. There were a few minor scratches left, but those didn’t require stitches, so it’d do.  
“Hey Cas, how’re you holdin’ up?”, Sam asked.  
“Relatively well. Dean is being very gentle.”  
“Good,” Sam said and started to collect the ruined clothes from the floor. He’d have to get rid of them. Except for the trench coat of course, that they’d fix for Cas.  
With the clothes in a bag, he announced, “I’m headin’ out to throw these away and get some food, you hungry?”  
“Nah, I’m fine,” Dean said, still closely inspecting his work.  
“No thank you, we’ve had a meal today before you found us,” Cas answered.  
“Tanith…”, Sam mumbled more to himself than to anyone else, shaking his head a little in disbelief, then he told them, “In that case, I might eat out, so don’t think anything of it if I don’t come back immediately.”  
“Alright,” Cas replied.  
“Take your time,” Dean added.  
Sam took a last moment to look at his brother and his best friend, sitting on a bed in different states of undress, then he turned around and left the room. Something was clearly going on between those two, Sam wasn’t stupid, he just couldn't pin down what exactly it was. Something must’ve happened in the forest. Either they were finally confronting their feelings and were just waiting for the right moment to sort it out, or they already had confronted their feelings and wanted some time alone. It had to be one of those, that was the only explanation for their strange behavior. The thing was, Sam couldn’t figure out which of those was the case. Not yet anyway. But that was okay, they’d tell him eventually and for now Sam was content with waiting in the knowledge that they were headed into the right direction.  
After the door clicked shut behind Sam, Cas started to speak, “You will have to tell him eventually.”  
“What, that I’m hella into you? He already knows that. Might’ve even figured it out before I did…”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah, I told him after a few too many drinks and he didn’t even look surprised,” Dean answered almost nonchalantly, “You have any wounds on your legs?”  
“No,” Cas answered, then switched back to the other topic, “And that was not what I meant. This… between us… it’s not really new, is it?”  
“No, it’s not.”  
“So it won’t just go away either. And I also don’t want it to…”  
Now Dean stopped examining Cas’ back and stared at his head for a moment, “Cas, is this your weird way of telling me that you wanna give this a real go? Because if it is, my answer is ‘hell yeah’. You’re too important to me to take this anything but serious, okay? And I’ve been wanting this with you for a long time.”  
Cas turned his head to look at Dean with that small smile of his and Dean asked, “So, are we on the same page now?”  
Cas nodded slightly, smile growing wider and Dean couldn’t help smiling back, “Good. Now lie back so I can take care of the scratches on your chest and stomach.”  
Cas complied, scooting to the side and lying down in the centre of the bed. Dean looked at him for a moment, lying half naked in bed with Dean by his side. He could get used to the sight.  
After adjusting his position on the bed, Dean leaned down to press a few gentle kisses to Cas’ chest and stomach, making the former angel relax momentarily.  
As he withdrew and started to stitch up the first slash, he said, “Sam’s onto us, he’s not stupid. I’ll tell him soon, maybe on the drive home or as soon as we arrive, but for now it’s fun to leave this just between the two of us.”  
“Hm, yes, I understand.”  
After Dean was done with the last of the big gashes, he put away the needle and leaned down again, letting his lips brush lightly against the soft skin in immediate vicinity of the wound. It was a featherlight touch that soothed the pain and caused Cas to let out a not exactly steady breath, his eyes fluttering closed. Spurred on by that reaction, Dean let his lips drift upwards over Cas’ chest, his collarbone and to his neck, where he pressed a wet and openmouthed kiss right to the former angel’s pulse point and Cas moaned, arching up against him, hand reaching up to thread fingers into Dean’s hair.  
Dean kissed up Cas’ neck, occasionally nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin, drawing soft noises from him that he never wanted to miss again. Cas was so responsive, so receptive to his every touch, as though he’d been craving it for years. After everything that had happened at this day, that might just actually be the case…  
Kissing along the former angel’s jaw, Dean relished in the feeling of slight stubble against his lips, before he leaned back barely, readjusting his position above Cas. The ex-angel spread his legs a little so Dean could get comfortable between them, then he reached a hand up to cup Dean’s face and run his thumb over his lower lip. The look on Cas’ face as he stared at Dean’s lips was one of pure, undisguised desire and it didn’t take long until Dean leaned back down to give his angel what he undoubtedly so desperately wanted.  
When their lips finally met again, Cas let out a bone-deep sigh of satisfaction, body arching up against Dean’s, searching for as much contact as possible, one hand snaking around Dean’s back, pulling him close and the other hand coming to the back of Dean’s neck, effectively keeping him in place. Not that he planned on going anywhere… No, he was perfectly content where he was, lying on top of Cas, who was essentially melting into him as he was kissing him senseless.  
When Cas opened his mouth in a silent invitation, Dean wasted no time to slip his tongue past those lips and explore. Cas let out a soft, pleased groan and returned the favor with enthusiasm. Dean absolutely couldn’t help the half groan, half whimper that escaped his throat when their tongues met. Damn, the guy could kiss…  
Cas brought one leg up to Dean’s thigh and used that new position to flip them over and straddle Dean. That sudden move caused Dean to make a sound of surprise in the back of his throat, but he certainly didn’t object. After having to come up for air, Cas grinned at Dean, inherently pleased with himself, before he leaned back down and started to kiss along Dean’s jaw and throat. Dean couldn’t help but expose his neck further, threading fingers through Cas’ hair, quietly encouraging him. The hunter was determined to get that glorious sex-hair back into place, damn it. When Cas started to nibble on Dean’s earlobe, he could no longer hold back a moan. Then Cas moved back down to his lover’s throat and Dean hummed in approval, soon also making other soft noises of pleasure.  
Now Cas started to suck at the sensitive skin right above Dean’s collarbone, making his toes curl into the sheets. That would make a nice hickey tomorrow… It was in a place where Dean could easily hide it, but he had no real intention in doing so. Maybe he’d tell Sam that way… It could be funny.  
Having enough of Cas’ lips on his throat for now, Dean used the hand that wasn’t tangled in the former angel’s hair to cup his jaw, pull his face up and seal their lips again in another passionate kiss.

Since the diner had been really full, Sam had gotten his dinner for takeaway after all and was now heading back to the motel. He parked the Impala and got out, heading straight towards the door of their room. While he was fumbling for the keys a little, he heard a strange noise come from the other side of the door. He wasn’t sure what it had been, although he had a pretty good idea. It most likely had something to do with Dean’s and Cas’ strange behavior and Sam’s suspicion that they were about to resolve their sexual tension soon. He probably shouldn’t go in there, but he wasn’t sure what it actually was that he’d heard and in the end curiosity won. He unlocked the door as silently as he could manage and reached for the door knob, twisting it in slow motion, before opening the door slowly and carefully to peek inside.  
What he saw was surprising, but at the same time it wasn't. There was his older brother, lying on a bed, still only clad in his underwear, while Castiel, the now fallen angel, was lying on top of him, still wearing pants and they didn’t even seem to notice Sam as absorbed as they were in each other. They appeared to be touching from head to toe while they were kissing soundly, occasionally letting out soft sighs and little moans.  
Sam instantly felt like an intruder in this very intimate moment. Quietly he closed the door again and left to get a room for himself. Preferably as far away from theirs as possible, just in case… They deserved some time to themselves. Sam couldn’t keep the grin from his face as he walked towards the lobby. He was happy for them.

Dean had never enjoyed kissing so much. He was sure, it was absolutely possible that he could get lost in Cas’ kisses for hours. He intended to try just that in the near future. Maybe even tonight. And oh, all the other things he intended to try with Cas… But this shitty motel room was no good place for that.  
When they had to come up for air again, Dean took a moment to appreciate the view before him. Cas shirtless, on top of him, hair standing on end like it should be, lips kiss bitten, eyes slightly hooded and an expression on his face that looked like a mixture of wonder and amazement, but also like he just couldn’t get enough of Dean as much as Dean couldn’t get enough of him. He’d never looked more beautiful. Upon precisely that thought, Dean realized that he was already far beyond saving, but he didn’t care. He just placed a hand in the back of Cas’ neck and leaned up to suck a decent hickey into the skin to match the one that was already blooming above his collarbone. It was partially revenge, but for the bigger part he was staking his claim and Cas absolutely loved it, letting out a low groan as he pushed further into Dean’s touch. He kept kissing and sucking at Cas’ neck, repeatedly paying attention to his pulse point as that always earned him a soft gasp and a light hitch of breath.  
“Found a sweet spot there, huh?”, Dean panted against Cas’ skin while they were both trying to catch their breath. Cas didn’t answer, he just made something like a quiet little whining noise and that was all the answer Dean needed. That piece of information was immediately filed away for future reference.  
Dean hummed against Cas’ neck, “Hmmm… One by one, I’m gonna find all of them… But I’ll take my time… to explore…” With those words, he placed a wet, openmouthed kiss to Cas’ pulse point.  
Cas felt like he was flying and falling at the same time. Dean was slowly reducing him to a mess of want and need. He’d never wanted anything as bad in his entire existence as he wanted Dean. He needed him with every fibre of his being. Upon hearing Dean’s softly spoken promise and feeling the man he loved essentially worshipping every inch of skin he could reach, Cas decided that he was ready to let go, to give himself over wholly. At the feeling of Dean’s unholy mouth against his throat, he didn’t even bother trying to hold back the loud moan that escaped his lips.  
That shameless moan came unexpected, but it did all kinds of things to Dean. If making out already did this to Cas, Dean couldn’t wait to see him when they’d make love. Jesus, he had it even worse than he’d thought.  
“Mmmh, the things I wanna do to you…”, Dean spoke against Cas’ jaw, hot breath ghosting over the fallen angel’s skin, who shivered in response.  
“The things I want you to do to me…,” Dean went on, “there are so many things I wanna try with you,” he paused to nip at Cas’ jaw, “As soon as we’re home, I’m gonna lock us into my room and take you apart bit by bit until you can’t think straight…”  
Those sweet, sweet promises pulled a pathetic keening noise from Cas that he would never admit to making and Dean looked up to admire his work. Cas’ eyes were hooded, pupils dilated and his breathing ragged, Dean himself wasn’t much better off, but he could still think clear enough to notice that Cas was definitely hard against him. He’d never seen his angel like this, letting go of all inhibitions and just giving in to want, lust and arousal. Dean loved every second of it, relishing in the knowledge that from now on he’d get to see this on a regular basis. That was a truly exhilarating thought.  
When Dean pulled Cas down for a kiss again, Cas kissed him back forcefully, feverishly and with utter desperation.  
He’d never loved anyone like he loved this man above him, the being who saved him from hell so many years ago and who continued saving him over and over. He’d been in love before, a few times, but never like this. He’d loved Lisa, of course he had, he’d thought of her as the love of his life for quite some time, before he’d figured out what his feelings for Cas actually were. But that love had been so entirely different. It had been soft and warm, a feeling that might’ve partially come with the feeling of having a home, a life away from hunting and a family to at least fill a small part of the void that had been left behind by Sam and Cas. What he felt for Cas was something else entirely, it was fierce, chaotic, relentless — a force of nature, like a raging hurricane or a forest fire burning deep inside his soul. He was addicted, helplessly devoted and more in love than he’d ever thought he could be. And now he was kissing the true love of his life.  
Suddenly overcome by a burst of want for the man he’d been pining after for such a long time, Dean jerked his hips upwards, providing wonderful friction that caused them both to let out groans of pleasure.  
Cas undoubtedly wanted this too, but he hesitated, “…What about Sam?”  
“Sam's okay with it,” Dean said, “probably getting himself a room of his own… otherwise he wouldn’t’ve silently backed out of our room.”  
“Wait, Sam was here?”, Cas asked dazedly and with confusion. Dean couldn’t help but chuckle, before pulling him in for another heated kiss.  
Dean changed their positions again, so that they were both lying on the mattress, facing each other. That way they could more comfortably jerk their hips together. Which was the moment when Dean decided it was incredibly unfair that Cas was still wearing more clothes than him. Without breaking their kiss, he hooked two fingers into the waistband of Cas’ sweats in a silent question and Cas didn’t even answer, he just helped Dean to pull his pants off. When they both got rid of their underwear, they started to move more frantically against each other, the feeling of skin on skin so unbelievably good. Then Dean wrapped his hand around both of them and started to stroke.  
The room was filled with groans of pleasure, panted breaths and moans of ‘Cas’ and ‘Dean’. Hands were wandering, exploring, all the while carefully avoiding the still fresh stitches in order to not cause any pain. They could both see their finish lines rapidly approaching and when Cas came, crying out Dean’s name, spilling white between them, it was only a matter of milliseconds until Dean followed suit, Cas’ name on his lips.  
For a few moments, the only sound in the room was their combined, slowly calming breathing. When Dean opened his eyes again to look at Cas, he could swear he’d never seen those blue eyes shine so bright. When their gazes met, Cas smiled at him.  
“Good?”, Dean couldn’t help asking.  
“Amazing,” Cas answered with a tinge of wonder to his voice.  
Dean didn’t even think about it as he kissed him on the nose and said, “You’re amazing.”  
But the way Cas’ smile grew even wider as his cheeks took on a slightly pink color, told Dean that it was exactly the right thing to say.  
“Y’know… when I came out as bi, I kinda hoped you’d make a move or something…”, he confessed then.  
Cas looked at him with a little surprise for a moment before he replied, “Dean, I already told you years ago that I love you.”  
“Yeah… But I thought… I don’t know, I thought you didn’t mean it like that.”  
“But I did,” Cas said solemnly.  
“Well, I know now.”  
That caused Cas to let out a low chuckle.  
Dean swallowed hard before saying softly, “You know I feel the same way…”  
Cas’ eyes were smiling when he said, “Well, I know now.”  
At that Dean couldn’t help but snicker, “Touché.”  
Comfortable silence fell over the room and Dean’s eyelids became heavy with exhaustion, satiation and contentment, but before he could nod off, Dean got up from the ruined sheets, wiped them both clean with a wet washcloth and pulled Cas up as well. The former angel complained about having to move, but Dean just pulled him close, telling him, “I don’t wanna sleep in that mess and believe me, neither do you. At least there’s one bed that isn’t dirty yet, now c’mon.”  
They both crawled under the clean sheets and Dean wasted no time to pull Cas close and curl up against him like he had done in the cave last night. Just this time, they both wrapped themselves around the other without hesitation, relishing the warmth and simply the fact that they could have this now.  
“I love you, Dean,” the fallen angel mumbled sleepily into the hunter’s skin.  
Dean pressed his nose into dark, unruly hair and whispered just loud enough for them to hear, “I love you, Cas.”  
Then Dean gave Cas a soft goodnight kiss before they fell asleep in a warm tangle of limbs.

The next morning was wrapped up in warm touches and soft kisses before they headed out onto the road with Sam. He kept smiling at them even after telling them his congratulations. Dean had deliberately put on a shirt that had his hickey just slightly peek out of his collar, while Cas hadn’t bothered covering his at all, essentially wearing it like a damn medal.  
They had a quick breakfast and then drove straight towards Kansas. The two lovebirds kept stealing smiles and glances in the rearview mirror and Sam wondered if his brother had ever paid less attention to the road and how he still managed to not cause an accident.  
When they finally arrived back home, they were tired. Sam wandered off into his own room, but Dean and Cas both disappeared into Dean’s room, which was big enough for two people anyway… They just rested for a few hours, snuggled up close, before Dean made good on his promises and locked the door.  
Sam put on his headphones and started to research about soundproofing spells.  
They took their time, making it last, slowly exploring and learning each other’s bodies from head to toe, memorizing every gasp, every hitch of breath, every sigh and every quiet moan. One by one they lived out their favorite fantasies about one another, until both of them were out of breath and neither could walk straight anymore.  
And when in the next morning, Dean came out of the room they were now supposedly sharing, wearing the freshly cleaned trench coat instead of his usual dead guy robe, Sam didn’t say a word and just smiled into his coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayyyyy, I hope you liked it! If so, let me know by leaving some kudos or a little comment please! It means more than you might think!! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Link to art on Tumblr:  
> https://nera-solani.tumblr.com/post/175444731542


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